I mean this literally and figuratively. I am still hovering after five months now at the same 27 to 30 pounds down. It hasn’t moved. I can’t brag about dropping another 12 to 14 pounds. My goal is still on the horizon. So WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON? (I wanted to use that F word instead of heck but then I realized I am 71 years old. Using that word for everything, verb, noun, pronoun, adjective is just lazy. Effective! Maybe, but still lazy, So I went with heck)
We still get the meaning and I start to understand. It has been almost five weeks since I put words to paper about where I am. I am where I was five weeks ago, MAYBE.
I actually decided to fast that day for eight days and then I put on a long sleeve shirt and sunglasses and a baseball hat from my coaching days and walked 15 miles on a 95 degree humid day in Florida. Something needed to be done. I am stuck. I didn’t get what I wanted fast enough.
Whine > Whine > Whine da da da da da da. Whine > Whine > Whine, Sounds a little like a Beatles song.
Okay, Donnie. They are a little better than this.
ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE da, da, da, da, da.
So, did it work? The walk not the song. The answer? Drum roll please. Of course it didn’t work.
I dehydrated myself to the point of boiling my eye balls right in my head. I think I could feel them boiling in the their own fluid. My back started to stiffen, and my legs started to cramp. I felt like I was going to die. I actually slept in a different room that night because I didn’t want to die in the bed with Donna. I know she would be standing over me in the morning shaking her head in wonder whispering sweetly… “NICE GOING A___ H___E. I can guarantee you’re going to lose that fat now, starting with the fat in your head.”
Remember, I am dead and she still is getting the last word… but she is right. I am going to lose that fat now. But I digress.
Donnie was worried. I did something stupid, unhelpful to me and anyone else except for one little thing. It’s just a tiny thing and it concerns our patches and water. You see I lost part of my mind and 12 pounds that day. Don’t get all excited and go out and try to kill yourself. I also lost my common sense, ability to hear, think and walk, but I did it. No not the weight. That came back on really quickly. It stabilized right in the area that God decided it should be for a while. Five weeks now to be exact. But the point is, and I am not kidding here, I did this.
Okay, It was stupid. That’s a given but was able to do this completely insane thing without killing myself. Yeah, I am still stuck but damn if I am not more resilient than I would be without these products. And, by the way, Donna is too. She is religious with the Light Therapy Patches. She is exercising one and a half to two hours a day on 95 degree days in Florida. She is doing it three to four days a week. She is in her mid sixties and has lost a total in her journey of over 80 pounds.
How is this possible you ask? C’mon you know the answer. She is doing her exercise in the pool. She does all different kinds of low impact things that she makes up for herself. She is getting steadily smaller, younger and prettier. She didn’t melt her eyeballs or other balls for that matter. Men are from Mars and women are well, they are just women, and thank God for that.
Back in ten days. I will modify it and make it work, but thanks to these patches and some really good ionic mineral water at 71 years young, I can still do some really stupid stuff and get away with it.
- by Tommie Weber
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